Domestic Violence
Family violence is any form of abuse or neglect that a child or adult experiences from a family member. Family violence can also come from someone who they have an intimate relationship with. Hurting and controlling someone who trusts and depends on them is an abuse of power.
Family violence can affect anyone. It happens in all types of relationships and families.
Remember it is not your fault. You are not alone, and there is help.
Types of abuse
Abuse can happen to anyone. Abuse is never okay. No one ever deserves abuse.
Physical abuse causes harm or death.
This can be when someone:
- Hits, slaps, pushes or kicks you.
- Strangles or chokes you.
- Stabs, cuts, shoots or burns you.
Emotional abuse is using words or actions to control or frighten someone.
This can be when someone:
- Makes threats.
- Puts you down or calls you names.
- Prevents you from seeing family or friends.
Sexual abuse is forced sexual activity.
This can be when someone:
- Touches you in a sexual way against your will.
- Continues sexual activity when you ask them to stop.
- Forces you to have unsafe sexual activity.
- Sexual abuse can happen in intimate partner relationships, such as engagements and marriages. Your partner cannot force you to have sex.
Financial abuse is the control or misuse of money or property.
This can be:
- Taking your money without your permission.
- Not letting you go to work.
- Forcing you to sell things or change your will.
Neglect is not providing basic needs or care to a dependent family member.
This can be:
- Not letting you go to the doctor.
- Not giving you food, clothing or medication.
- Abandoning you.
| Abuse warning signs | ||||
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Abuse has many warning signs. If you see these warning signs in your relationship, or with others, it is time to get help.
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Have a safety plan
Having a safety plan is very important. You need to protect yourself and the safety of any children involved. Making a safety plan means deciding what you will do if you are experiencing abuse, whether you choose to remain at home or leave.
Make a plan and talk to someone you trust.In an emergency, call 911.
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Pregnancy and domestic violence |
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Domestic violence can happen more often during pregnancy than in any other time. Experiencing any type of abuse can have serious impacts on your health and your baby’s health. If you have a history of intimate partner violence you may be more likely to experience mental health issues during pregnancy. |
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Children and domestic violence |
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Domestic violence affects children in many ways. Children who live in an abusive home, and who witness abuse, may not grow in a healthy way. Home should be a safe place for your children. Children living with abuse may:
Children need to feel safe at home to grown into healthy and caring adults. It is never too late to get help. |
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What is a healthy relationship? |
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Everyone deserves to be loved, valued, and to feel safe in their relationships. Not all relationships are healthy. It is important to know what a healthy relationship means. A healthy relationship means that you:
An unhealthy relationship means:
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Where to get help |
In an emergency, call 911. Durham Region ServicesHelplines:
Shelters and hostels:
Other help:
Find more Helpline Numbers and Shelters in Durham. For more information about abuse, or where to get help, visit the Public Health Agency of Canada: "Stop Family Violence" website. Women abuse and child witness programThere is a free program to help mothers who have experienced violence. The program can help you with parenting, stress and building a healthy relationship with your child. The Catholic Family Services of Durham runs this program. For more information, call the Catholic Family Services of Durham at 1-877-282-8932, or visit Catholic Family Services of Durham. To read more about the program, visit Mothers in Mind. |
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Protecting your computer privacy |
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Be careful what you write and search on your computer. An abuser can look at your computer activity. Never share your passwords and always log out of your accounts. Be careful not to post any personal information or your location on social media. Use a computer at work, a friend's house or at the library. If you need to use your own computer, you can clear your browser and search history when you are done. Clear your browser historyFollow these steps to clear your browser's history: Internet Explorer
Firefox
Safari
Chrome
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Partner Assault Response Program
Family Services Durham offers a Partner Assault Response (PAR) Program, which provides counselling to adults involved with the justice system due to domestic abuse against a current or former partner. Participants attend 12 two-hour group meetings. Separate groups are offered for male and female participants.
When individuals attend the PAR Program, staff contacts their victims/partners to offer safety planning, support, and referrals to community resources.
| What to expect at the PAR Program |
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Each group session involves education, discussion, and other activities. Topics include:
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| When and where |
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Group sessions are held weekly. Daytime and evening groups are available. PAR staff will attempt to register you for the group most convenient for you. The program is offered at 605 Rossland Road East in Whitby. |
| Fees |
| The PAR Program is provided by Family Services Durham with funding from the Ministry of the Attorney General and client fees. Participants in the PAR Program pay a fee based on a sliding scale. |
For more information about the PAR Program, call 311 or toll-free 1-888-721-0622.
Contact Us
Health Department
Durham Health Connection Line
The Regional Municipality of Durham
605 Rossland Road East
Whitby, Ontario L1N 6A3
Telephone: 905-666-6241
Toll-Free: 1-800-841-2729
Email Durham Health Connection Line
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